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Tales of youth, delinquency, joy.

Ode to Night Cruise

It was high school. I made a call to my mom at 12:30 on a Friday night. Despite the late hour, she picked up — my parents always pick up and I love them for it. Her voice came back heavy with sleep. She said: yeah? And she would’ve been concerned if she wasn’t still half asleep. My dad was out of town. This call would have been Dad duty if he was home. I felt bad; I asked if she could come get me...

Revelations of a Couch Surfer

I understand why people do drugs.  Drugs and alcohol have the magical ability to take you somewhere else and it’s right here. A short trip. The journey is from your mind to your mirth, from your perception to what it is you’re perceiving — the lateral move from intaking reality to being a part of it. They call it mindfulness. Drugs achieve it so effortlessly that it’s hard to classify as the same...

Destination or Channeller?

This wasn’t my first time to Whistler. I was there for a couple nights in November, a couple nights in 2017 as well. I’d been as a kid, for the skiing. This trip though was seven nights at a timeshare/hotel room right in the village, overlooking the Olympic Plaza. Our room could hold six people and there was a hot tub shared by all the guests of our building down a series of hallways. I never...

Becoming Gookish Pt. 2

“I haven’t seen someone sleeping in months.” “I haven’t been beside a sleeping person. I’ve been alone. I go to bed, I wake up. I don’t see myself sleep. I don’t see anyone sleeping.”  I wrote that in my journal at the beginning of the month. It’s an inconsequential joy, to see someone sleeping, but it’s a wholesome one. Given that it’s been almost one year of various quarantining protocols, I’m...

Doomsday Prepping

I’ve always liked rules. Not the kind that inhibit actions but the kind that provide conditional instructions. Commandments that provide clarity and quell difficulty. I would make them for myself. The hope was to turn some of the messiness of growing up into objective protocols. I wanted assurance — statues that would guide me down the right path, and when they didn’t, I could say, well I did...

Open Doors

I couldn’t sleep last night. Of course, I did. Eventually.  While my thoughts paced in the blackness behind my eyelids, they passed over my childhood. (How lovely — to think of incidents from decades ago instead of drifting off.) When I was a boy and I couldn’t sleep, it was only ever caused by one of two reasons: either the excitement about Santa’s visit in the night, or open doors. Open doors...

Regarding Break-ups

Tell me: “I don’t like you anymore” — that’s what I want. And it’s what you should want too.  Whether it came on quickly or it built over time, once the feelings of “I need to break up with this person” entered her (or their) mind, they were not going anywhere until they were addressed. More likely, they became a gremlin that was found peering back at her throughout the day, staring at her from...

Travelling West

Our 787 hunts the setting sun towards the horizon behind the Pacific Ocean. Though we don’t look like hunters. Instead, evenly-spaced and hushed, we passengers look like we’re running from something. Masks pulled tightly behind the ears, the air that seeps in though the creases at our cheeks is recycled through “hospital grade filters,” we’re assured. 29A is a window...

Moment of Promise

If anyone else had been there, or if anyone had even come by, I wouldn’t have been the state I was in. It’s only through the hours of solitary studying, where the content is ungraspable and so is the purpose that the content would even exist in the first place or that the content would be taught in a class and decided to be put against students in a test or that that singular test would decide...

Suspension and Redemption

The well-mannered sophisticate you’ve come to know to be the author of these whimsical anecdotes actually shares the tarnished record of his subjects, as you may have suspected. All the aliases in the world can’t distance me from the shame and misconduct some of these blog posts contain. But today is an exception. This story is about me, guileless, with a proud message… if you can get to the end...

 

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